And the score stands--   Audience:  1       Candidates:  0

Seriously, the very vocal audience members in last night's debate proved the real victor.  This sampling of America, or rather Fox Network's America, showed themselves to be as stand-out as their current or potential leaders.  Each hearty laugh and contemptuous boo worthy of a Shakespearean play contrasted comically with the quaffed and dandy candidates, who happened upon a moment of political correctness (Newt) and saved countless Americans from a futile search for Bigfoot (Mitt).  So while the status-quo wasn't challenged too much last night in terms of politics, we all burned off that extra cookie laughing along.  This is to you, audience members.  Though you may not be able to hold these mighty candidates to their resolutions, you've held other Americans to their always-involving-weight-loss-but-usually-defunct-by-January 4 New Year's resolutions.  

On a complete side note, Wikipedia will not be online tomorrow.  All students with research to do, beware.